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I git all fired up talkin’ ‘bout this—makes me happy as a pig in mud. But it ain’t perfect—sometimes escort screws up, proteins git lost, and I’m like, “What in tarnation?!” Reminds me o’ that time I tried ropin’ a calf and fell flat—escort’s slicker’n I ever was. Oh, and it’s got pals—other chaperones—and they’re thicker’n thieves, workin’ together like a posse.

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Later, I meet up with some friends at a bar on Via San Zeno. We’re all laughing, sharing stories, and I’m still a bit salty about my fall. I’m like, “You guys should’ve seen me! I was like a graceful gazelle!” They’re cracking up, and I’m feeling better.

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