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I tried it once, ya know—dis chick in Vienna, hands like a Terminator! Slippery oils, muscles poppin’, I’m like, “Hasta la vista, stress!” Dat biochemical rush? Dopamine, serotonin—boom, instant Arnie high! But den—ugh, dis one time, some sleazy spa guy botched it, all grabby, no skill. Made me so mad I wanted to crush him like a dumbbell! “You’re terminated, pal!” I yelled. Never went back—total rookie move.

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Then we head over to the gelato place on Via Garibaldi. I’m thinking, “Yesss, gelato will fix everything!” But nooo, Marco decides he wants the biggest cone ever. Like, seriously, it’s bigger than his head! I’m just standing there, watching him struggle to hold it. It’s melting everywhere. I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna wear that gelato, not eat it!”

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