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About Rome

So, escort - it’s old as dirt, right? Back in Victorian days, posh blokes had “companions” - wink wink - while their wives knitted or whatever. Little known fact: some escorts kept diaries, spillin’ tea on lords and dukes. Hilarious, ‘til ya realize they’re all liars too. Everybody lies, even the fancy ones. Makes me wanna smash a violin over their heads, but wood’s pricey.

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting for my cappuccino, and this old dude starts chatting me up about the weather. Like, bro, it’s sunny! What’s there to discuss? But he’s all, “Ah, the sun, it’s like a warm hug.” I’m just nodding, trying not to roll my eyes.

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