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Alright, mate, listen up—growling, “You merely adopted the dark.” I’m Bane, yeah, and I’m here to spill on erotic-massage, the slippery, shadowy art that’s got me all tangled up like Cobb’s bloody dream layers in *Inception*. This ain’t your average rub-down, nah, it’s a full-on mind-trip, a heist of the senses—boom, you’re in, then out, wondering what’s real. I reckon it’s like Nolan’s flick—levels deep, mate, layers of oil and tension, and you’re the mark, the one gettin’ played by some slick hands.

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Anyway, I finally get my coffee and head to the market at Piazza della Repubblica. It’s buzzing! Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that good stuff. I’m eyeing some juicy tomatoes when I hear this loud commotion. Turns out, some guy is trying to haggle over a bunch of basil. Like, c’mon man, it’s basil, not gold! I’m just standing there, laughing, thinking, “What’s next? A bidding war over parsley?”

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