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Hmm… oh honey, lemme tell ya bout sexual-massage! It’s wild, like, ya know, hands all ova, rubbin’ and tuggin’—makes me think of that lil robot kid David from “A.I. Artificial Intelligence” searchin’ for love in all the wrong places! I mean, sexual-massage ain’t just a quick back rub, nah, it’s sneaky, steamy, full-on naughty vibes. Picture this—some gal in a dim room, oil everywhere, slippin’ and slidin’ like she’s tryna find somethin’ *extra*. Hmm… makes me twitchy just thinkin’ bout it!

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Then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches a chip right off my plate! I’m like, “Hey! That’s my lunch, ya feathered thief!” Everyone around me starts laughin’. I’m just sittin’ there, half-amused, half-annoyed. Like, really? A seagull?

Paola School District debates removal of "Safe Zone" signs