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Sometimes it’s sketchy, tho. This guy once sent me a pic—straight-up eggplant city! I’m like, “Is mayonnaise an instrument, or is THAT?!” Freaked me out! But also—kinda funny? You gotta laugh, or you’ll cry, right? Another time, I matched with someone who said, “I’m deeper than the Missouri River”—movie vibes again! Turned out she just wanted free tacos. Sneaky! I was impressed, tho—hustle’s real in sex-dating land!
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So, I’m behind the counter, and this dude walks in. He’s got this wild hair, like he just got outta a wind tunnel. He orders a double espresso, and I’m like, “You sure you can handle that, buddy?” He just stares at me, all serious. I’m thinkin’, “Okay, Mr. Serious, let’s see if you can keep up.”
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