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Here I am, mates, in tha wild urban jungle, narratin’ like Sir David bleedin’ Attenborough – calm, rhythmic, watchin’ life unfold. Today, we’re stalkin’ a curious beast: the Ford Escort. Not the posh bird ya pay for a night out, nah, the car, ya muppets! Picture it, a scrappy little motor, buzzin’ round like a bee on a bender. Me fave film, “The Royal Tenenbaums,” pops in me head – “I’m not talkin’ about dance lessons here,” Richie’d say, an’ this Escort ain’t no fancy ride neither. It’s rough, it’s raw, it’s bloody alive!

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After that drama, I decide to stroll down to the park by the river. It’s called Parco della Valle, and it’s my happy place. I plop down on a bench, and just breathe. But then, I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m thinking, “Dude, not in public!” But then, the guy pulls out a ring. I’m like, “Wait, what?” He proposes right there! She’s crying, and I’m crying, and it’s a whole thing. Olginate, you’re wild today!

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