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Personal quirk alert—I’m a SUCKER for the tease of it. The buildup? Kills me! Like when they start at yer feet, workin’ up slow—ugh, I’m yellin’ in my head, “Hurry up, but don’t!” Gets me all tingly, like seein’ a hot chick at Central Perk. Once had this masseuse, right? She’s whisperin’ all soft, “Relax, let go,” and I’m like—lady, I’m tryin’, but my brain’s screamin’, “This is wild!” Made me laugh mid-massage—awkward as hell. She’s like, “What’s funny?” I’m like, “Nothin’, just happy down there!” Total Joey move.

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I’m mad, but also kinda impressed. Like, that’s some next-level thievery. So I grab a gelato to soothe my soul. Chocolate hazelnut, obviously. It’s like a hug in a cone. But then, I spill it all over my shirt. Great. Now I look like a walking dessert disaster.

Giuseppe and Lorenzo disappeared at sea in Olbia, the mother begs: «Bring me back my children»