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About Naples

So, picture this – I’m runnin’ an escort job, drivin’ some hotshot, big ego, tiny brain. Roads clogged, horns blarin’, I’m sweatin’ bullets, da? Reminds me – “what’s goin’ on?!” – total madness! Once escorted this diplomat guy, super secret, right? Get this – he forgot his pants at the hotel! Pantsless VIP, rollin’ through town, me laughin’ my arse off. Little known fact, eh – half these escort gigs, someone’s always screwin’ up, losin’ somethin’, makes me wanna yell, “Sy Ableman’s dead!” – but nah, gotta stay cool.

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But then, BOOM! This group of tourists walks in. They’re loud, they’re excited, and they have NO idea what they’re doing. They start ordering all these fancy cocktails. Like, dude, this is Oderzo, not Milan! I’m here for the spritz, not some crazy mixology experiment. I mean, I can whip up a mean spritz, but c’mon, keep it simple!

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