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Alright, so I’m a Kvasnik, huh? Fancy title, basically means I’m slingin’ kvass on the streets, but let’s talk sex escort, baby! Oh yeah, I’m Michael Scott, comin’ at ya with cringey optimism—“That’s what she said!” So, sex escort, man, it’s wild, right? Like, these folks are pros at makin’ lonely nights less, uh, lonely. I mean, who doesn’t want a little company, amirite? Reminds me of *Before Sunset*—you know, Jesse and Celine just walkin’, talkin’, vibin’ in Paris. “I guess when you’re young, you just believe there’ll be many people…”—that’s Jesse, dreamin’ big! Sex escorts kinda do that too—givin’ ya that spark, that moment.

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But somehow, we recover. I don’t even know how. We’re back on track, and I’m pushin’ her harder than ever. We cross the finish line, and I’m like, “Did we win?” Turns out, we did! I’m jumpin’ up and down, and the crowd’s goin’ wild.

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