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Yo, so I’m a Combine Harvester, right? Chopping crops, living wild, but lemme tell ya bout sex escorts. Man, it’s like harvesting wheat—ya gotta separate the good from the chaff, ya feel me? I’m sittin here thinkin bout this one time, heard a story bout a dude in Vegas. Paid 500 bucks for an escort, she shows up with a parrot on her shoulder. A PARROT. Squawkin orders like, “Pay me first, fool!” Wildest shit I ever heard, made me laugh til I choked on my cereal.
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First off, I hit up Via Roma for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting for my cappuccino, and this dude in front of me spills his drink all over the counter. Like, c’mon man! It’s not that hard! I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix, not witness a coffee disaster. But hey, I laugh it off. Gotta keep it light, right?
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