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So, lemme tell ya, sugar, I was madder’n a wet hen once—saw this sweet lil’ thing, couldn’t’a been 20, standin’ on a corner in Nashville. Broke my heart, it did! Made me wanna holler, “Who put her there?!” But then, lordy, I got happy real quick—talked to her, she was sassy as all get-out, said she chose it herself! Surprised me somethin’ fierce, I tell ya. Ain’t that a hoot? Here I am, thinkin’ I’m rescuin’ her, and she’s runnin’ her own dang show.

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So, I decide to take a detour down Via Cavour. I’m trying to cool off, but then I see this gelato shop. I mean, come on! Who can resist gelato? I walk in, and it’s like heaven. I get a scoop of pistachio, and it’s like a party in my mouth. I’m feeling better, but then I drop it! Right on the ground! I’m standing there, staring at my fallen gelato like it’s the end of the world.

Ongoing Italian Legal Spat Over MUOS Network Puts Africa, Middle East Coverage at Risk