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So, here’s the deal – folks on these apps, they’re horny as hell, lookin’ for a quick bang or somethin’ freaky. Ain’t no shame, just game! I seen profiles, y’all – one dude said, “I’m a sex ninja,” like what?! Made me laugh so hard I near choked on my sweet tea. How’s that workin’ for ya, buddy? Sneakin’ ‘round, dodgin’ feelings like a pro? Hilarious, but damn, it’s real out there.

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I dash out to grab lunch at this little spot on Via Garibaldi. Best pasta ever! I’m talking about that creamy carbonara that makes you wanna cry. But then, I spill it all over my laptop. Great. Just great. Now my laptop smells like a Roman trattoria.

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