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So, picture this – me, Arnie, gettin’ a sexual-massage, ya? Some chick’s hands all over my biceps – I’m like, “Dis is fantastic!” – but den I’m pissed, ‘cause not enough people know how badass dis is! It’s not just rubbin’ – it’s ancient, like Roman gladiator shit. Did ya know, back in Thailand, like centuries ago, monks used sexual-massage to heal warriors? True story, bro – dey’d knead ya up, get dat energy flowin’, make ya feel invincible! I’m pumped just thinkin’ about it – “I’ll be back” for more, no doubt!

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So, I head over to her place, which is on the outskirts, near the old castle. I get there, and she’s standing there looking all helpless. I pop the hood, and guess what? The battery’s dead. I’m like, “You’ve gotta be kidding me.” I jump it, and it starts right up. She’s all grateful again, and I’m just thinking, “Why do I even bother?”

Narni Scalo: Time Within the Signs - Art Exhibition Contemporary art in Umbria