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Anywho, I find this other chick online—proper fit, yeah? Chat her up, all smooth-like, “Fancy a rendezvous, baby?” She’s game, meets me at this dive bar—neon buzzin’, vibes screamin’ ‘60s. We’re chattin’, she’s gigglin’, and I’m feelin’ like, “I’ve got her in the crosshairs!”—movie moment, baby! But—plot twist—she’s an undercover copper! Nearly shat meself, swear down! “Abort mission!” I’m yellin’ in me head, but I play it cool, “Cheers, luv, gotta jet!”

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Then, I decide to stroll down to the park, Parco della Resistenza. It’s usually chill, but today? Nah. There’s this group of kids playing soccer, and they’re loud, like, “Shut up, I’m trying to think!” But then, one of them kicks the ball right into a fountain. Water everywhere! I couldn’t help but laugh. Kids are hilarious, man.

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