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Oh, and the slang—‘whore’ gets chucked round like confetti now, don’t it? Call yer mate one for nickin’ yer chips—hilarious, that! But real talk, it’s a job, innit? Risky as hell—makes me twitchy thinkin’ bout it. Ever hear bout the French courtesans, tho? Lived like queens, shaggin’ kings—proper posh whores! Blows me mind, that does.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, torrential downpour. I’m standing there, tools in hand, soaked to the bone. I’m cursing the weather gods. “Really? You couldn’t wait an hour?” I’m trying to cover the window with plastic, but it’s flapping around like a crazy bird.

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