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But here’s what chaps my hide – folks judgin’ it! “Oh, it’s dirty!” they squawk. Bullcrap! It’s science, ya prudes! Muscles loosen, stress hightails it outta there – what’s wrong with that? “The dead don’t care,” Saul’d mutter, but us livin’ folks? We deserve a damn break! Sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ – it’s art, like paintin’ a barn with yer hands tied. Takes skill, y’all! I seen this gal once, hands like a wizard, had me floatin’ – thought I’d died and gone to honky-tonk heaven.

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Finally, I get a break. I dash out to grab that pizza. The sun’s shining, and I’m feelin’ good. But as I’m walking, I see this old lady struggling with her groceries on Via Vittorio Emanuele. I rush over, help her out, and she’s all smiles. “You’re a good kid!” she says. Makes my day, ya know?

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