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Precious, oh precious! Me, Gollum, loves talkin’ bout sex escorts, yesss! Stupid, fat hobbit wouldn’t get it—too busy eatin’! So, escorts, right? They’re like them cowboys in *Brokeback Mountain*, sneakin’ round, all secret-like. “I wish I knew how to quit you,” one says—hah! Escorts prolly say that to their cash, not lovers! Me thinks it’s wild—sellin’ love, or somethin’ close, for a quick buck. Gets me all twitchy and mad—why’s it gotta be so hush-hush?
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After the race, I’m feeling like a million bucks. I head back to my shop, but on the way, I bump into this street performer on Via della Libertà. He’s juggling flaming torches! I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna set yourself on fire!” But he’s all cool, just smiling and doing his thing. I toss him a couple of euros. Gotta support the arts, right?
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