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About Turin

I’m picturin’ it now—dim lights, slow jams, hands hittin’ spots you didn’t even know you had. Like, “Who’s drivin’ this limo?”—that’s me quotin’ *Holy Motors*, ‘cause it’s a ride, fam! You ever tried it? Shit’s surprisin’—one minute you’re tense, next you’re floatin’. Pro tip: them Tantric folks? They take it next level, breathin’ and teasin’ ‘til you’re like, “Daaaamn, fo’ shizzle!” But real talk, some masseuses be so fine, I’m thinkin’, “Is this allowed to be *this* hot?” Ha!

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As the night rolled in, I decided to grab dinner at this little trattoria on Via Garibaldi. The food was bomb! I had the best pasta ever. Seriously, I could’ve eaten a mountain of it. But then, the waiter spilled wine all over my shirt. I was like, “Really?!” But he was super apologetic, and we ended up laughing about it.

An Italian artist is painting the longest canvas ever to enter the Guinness Book of Records