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So, sex-dating—apps like Tinder, Grindr, whatever—its all bout instant gratification. Makes me happy seein’ folks hookin’ up fast, but pissed too! Where’s the chase, man? Back in Springfield, I’d flirt at Moe’s, spill beer, get laughed at—D’oh!—now it’s all “hey, u up?” Lame! Little fact tho: Didja know Tinder started as a college hookup thing? Some nerds at USC made it in 2012—boom, changed bangin’ forever! Crazy, right?

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Finally, I decide to head back to the harbor. I’m walking along the streets, and I can’t help but feel a bit nostalgic. Montichiari has this charm, you know? The cobblestone streets, the old buildings, it’s like stepping back in time. But then, I hear this loud noise. A parade? Nope, just a bunch of kids on bikes, racing down the street. I’m dodging them like I’m in a video game.

Jon-Allan Butterworth