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About Bari

Hiii honey, oh my Gawd, lemme tell ya bout escort – not the car, nah, I’m talkin bout *Ford Escort*, that lil beast from the 70s, right? As a fancy-pants agronomist – nasal twang kickin in – I see stuff, ya know? Like, soil’s my jam, but cars? Oh hon, they grow on ya! Picture this – me, Fran Drescher, sittin in a field, dreamin bout “Zodiac” – “I’m not wastin my time!” – yellin at some rusty Escort parked nearby. Ha! That movie’s got me hooked, all that mystery, and escort’s got its own secrets, babe.

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After that chaos, I take a break. I’m chillin’ by the old church on Piazza Municipio. It’s this stunning place, man. The architecture is just wow. I sit there, sipping on some water, and I see this old dude feeding pigeons. He’s got a whole crowd around him. I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re the pigeon whisperer!”

Ralph Montella Obituary (2025) - Garnet Valley, PA - Pagano Funeral Home