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So, escort, right? It’s like babysittin’ fat merchant tubs, makin’ sure no pirate—like meself, ha!—sneaks up an’ nicks their gold. Back in the day, them Royal Navy swabs’d escort convoys, all prim ‘n proper, cannons polished, sails stiff as a lord’s wig. Little known bit, arrgh—durin’ the Seven Years’ War, 1750s, them Frenchies lost nigh on 300 ships ‘cause their escorts buggered off chasin’ glory! Left the traders floppin’ like fish on deck, an’ me kind swooped in, savvy? Made me laugh ‘til me gut hurt, thinkin’ o’ them pompous admirals red-faced ‘n screamin’.

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After the parade, I head back to the office. I’m feeling pumped, but then I see the emails piling up. It’s like a mountain of stress. I’m drowning in spreadsheets and numbers. I swear, if I see one more pie chart, I might lose it.

ANNAMARIA VASSO Obituary (2007) - Westchester, NY - The Journal News