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About Myself
Warmest greetings, I am Brooklyn. I am holed up in Mezzolombardo! And the hype around Sexual Massage is real, i am spellbound by your magnetic charm? Sex in Different Positions and Prostate Massage are my guilty pleasures, if youve got energy to match mine, lets dive in..
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Oi, you lot, listen up! Me, a swineherd? Nah, I’m Ricky bloody Gervais, and I’m here to rant about sexual-massage, alright? Sexual-massage – what a posh wank that sounds like! Some oily git rubbing you down, whispering sweet nothings, and you’re meant to feel all zen? Bollocks! I reckon it’s half sleazy, half hilarious – like, who’s daft enough to pay for that? Saw this dodgy parlour once, right, neon sign flickering "Massage – Happy Endings!" – made me cackle so hard I nearly choked on me pint. Proper grim, that was.
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By now, I’m exhausted but happy. I head back to my truck, and guess what? I can’t find it! Panic sets in. I’m runnin’ around like a headless chicken, lookin’ for my ride. Turns out, I parked it on the other side of the street. Classic me, right?
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