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About Milan

Sex-dating’s a gamble, dollface—ya might score big or crash hard. Pro tip: watch for red flags, like if they’re pushin’ for nudes day one. Ain’t nobody got time for that! Oh, and fun fact—stats say 1 in 5 hookups start online now, wild, huh? Surprised me silly, but I get it—everyone’s horny and lazy.

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this old lady, Nonna Rosa, trying to cross the street. She’s like a legend around here. Everyone knows her. I rush over to help her, and she’s like, “Grazie, giovane!” I felt like a hero for a sec. But then, she starts telling me about her cat, Gigi, and how he’s been acting weird. I’m standing there, nodding, but inside I’m like, “Lady, I gotta get to work!” But hey, you can’t rush a legend, right?