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Oi mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as fuck, “shaken, not stirred.” So, sexual-massage, yeah? Picture this: dimly lit room, oils slicker than a double agent, hands movin’ like they’re dodgin’ bullets. I’m the Gardener, tendin’ to the naughty bits of life, and this shit’s my jam. Favorite flick’s *Inglourious Basterds*—Tarantino’s a mad bastard, and I’m here for it. “You know somethin’, Utivich?” Sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’—it’s a bloody art, a scalp-tinglin’ espionage of the senses.

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After the morning rush, I finally get a breather. I step outside for a sec. The sun’s shining on Piazza degli Aranci. It’s beautiful, man. The orange trees are blooming, and I can smell the citrus in the air. I take a deep breath, and for a moment, everything’s chill.

‘Did they think Massa would fight them with her doll or her ball?’ – family mourn girl (4) killed in Israeli attack