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But—plot twist—some dude next room starts moanin’. Loud. I’m pissed, thinkin’, “Bro, this ain’t your porn audition!” Ruined my zen, total buzzkill. Still, the masseuse, she’s a pro—whispers, “Ignore him, feel this.” And bam, she’s on my lower back, pressure like a hydraulic press. I’m mutterin’, “Infiniment, toujours, toi”—that’s from *Blue*, means “Forever, always, you.” Corny? Sure. But it fit—her hands were speakin’ my language.

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We are a body 2 body massage in Apulia website that facilitates introductions with women that enjoy full body and erotic massages.

First call comes in around 9 AM. Some dude’s grillin’ on Via Cavour, and boom! Flames everywhere. I’m like, “Really, bro? It’s not even noon!” So, I gear up, hop in the truck, and we’re off. The streets are packed, as usual. I mean, who doesn’t love a good morning traffic jam on Via Mazzini? I’m sittin’ there, fuming, thinkin’ about how I could be sippin’ espresso instead of dodging scooters.

Drifting Through Puglia, Italy’s Heel (Published 2019)