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About Naples

Gets me giddy, tho—chattin’ up strangers, all flirty, “Hey cutie, wyd?” Feels like Leonardo DiCaprio yellin’, “The show goes on!” Happy vibes when she’s into me SpongeBob charm—hyper giggle fit! But ugh, ANGRY when catfishes pop up—dude pretendin’ he’s a hot mermaid? Rude! Once saw a profile, “6’2, ripped,” met him—5’5, rounder than Mr. Krabs! Laughed so hard I snorked me pineapple juice!

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Finally, the rain stops, and I step outside. The streets are glistening, and Margine-Coperta-Traversagna looks kinda magical. I’m feeling all poetic, ya know? But then I remember I parked my bike near the old fountain. I rush over, and guess what? It’s gone! I’m like, “No way! Not my bike!”