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But real talk, it’s fascinatin’. These apps, man, they’re like a meat market—everyone’s posin’, flexin’, tryna look tasty. Reminds me of *Eternal Sunshine*—all that messy love crap. “Sand is overrated, it’s just tiny rocks,” right? That’s sex-dating profiles for ya—just polished turds hopin’ to shine. I get a kick outta it tho, scrollin’ through, judgin’ these fools. One guy said he’s “fluent in sarcasm”—buddy, you ain’t fluent in spellin’, calm down.

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Finally, I get to the school. I’m a typhlopedagogue, which is just a fancy way of sayin’ I teach visually impaired kids. And lemme tell ya, these kids are the best! They’re like little sponges, soaking up everything. But today? Oh boy. One of my students, Marco, he’s a character. He walks in, all smiles, and says, “I can smell pizza!” I’m like, “Dude, we’re not having pizza today!” But he’s convinced.

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