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About Turin

Worst part? Liars everywhere! Bloke says he’s 6 foot, shows up 5’2”—idiot sandwich! Lass says “curvy,” rocks up like a bloody whale—sort it out! Exaggeratin’s fine, but don’t catfish me, ya twit! Oh, and the clap—sex-datin’s a petri dish for that shit. Wear a johnny, you muppets—learned that from a mate who didn’t. Nasty surprise, that was.

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My wife and I are in our late sixties, in good health, and still enjoy intimacy. At this stage of our lives we prefer 'manual' sex, and fantasy.

Then I decide to stroll down to Piazza Vittorio Emanuele. It’s a nice spot, but man, the pigeons are relentless. I swear, they’re plotting something. I’m dodging them like I’m in some weird video game. “Level 1: Pigeon Attack.” I laugh it off, but inside, I’m like, “Why are these birds so aggressive?”

1995 Wetumpka football team 'squarely behind' 2017 squad