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Oi, you lot, listen up! Escorts, yeah? What a bloody racket! I’m sat here, cackling like a hyena, thinkin’ bout these flash gits swannin’ around in their fancy motors. Proper job for the lonely, innit? Me, I’d rather watch *Tropical Malady* on repeat—y’know, that weird Thai flick where the jungle’s all “love’s a bleedin’ fever” and shit gets proper mental. Escortin’s like that, ain’t it? All mysterious, steamy vibes—then bam, you’re lost in the sauce.

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I decide to hit up the local market on Via XX Settembre. It’s bustling! Fresh veggies, fruits, and all these cute little stalls. I grab some tomatoes and cheese. I’m thinking, “Dinner sorted!” But then, I see this guy selling gelato. I mean, c’mon, who can resist gelato? I get a scoop of pistachio, and it’s like heaven in a cone.

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