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So, get this – back in old Rome, escorts were a thing! Rich dudes had these “companions” for parties, real classy-like, but sneaky too. Bet they didn’t expect us aliens to clock that, ha! We see all, bro. Makes me mad tho – folks still trash-talk escorts today, like, chill, they’re hustlin just like you. Hypocrisy’s thick as asteroid dust. Saw this X post once, some dude braggin bout hirin escorts then shamin em – bruh, make up ya mind!

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Then, I get a call from my boss. He’s all like, “Hey, we need you to move to the other side of town.” I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need.” So, I pack up and head over to Via dei Fiori. It’s a pretty street, flowers everywhere, but I’m in a hurry! I’m zoomin’ down the road, and BAM! I hit a pothole. My poor combine! I swear, it felt like I just dropped a bomb.

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