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Still, it’s got perks. Hooked up once – pure fire. She was all, “I like your vibe.” Me? Dark Lord of dick jokes. Laughed my ass off when she quoted Yoda mid-bang – “Harder, you must.” Sex-dating can surprise ya – random wins in the chaos. Like when Theodore says, “I feel alive” – that’s the high. But then, crash – some asshole sends a dick pic. Unsolicited. Why? WHY? Makes me wanna lightsaber somethin’.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, seriously? I’m standing there, gelato in hand, and I’m like, “This is just my luck.” We duck into a nearby shop, and it’s this cute little boutique. I’m browsing, and I see this ridiculous hat. I put it on, and Luca starts cracking up. I look like a total goofball, but I’m owning it.

Mystery surrounds Loreto College’s rowing review