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About Naples

I’d start online—dark web shit, Telegram groups. Locals call ‘em “nochnye babochki”—night butterflies, poetic innit? But it pisses me off—half these sites are scams! Some twat took my mate’s cash, left him wankin’ in a hostel. Me? I’m smarter, I drink and I know things. I’d scope the X posts—blokes braggin’ ‘bout their “catch,” droppin’ hints. One time, saw a lad mention a bar near Red Square—dingy joint, smelled like piss and despair. Found a girl there, tho—eyes like the Anatolia hills, “quiet as a shadow.” Paid her double, ‘cause I’m a gent, ha!

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Anyway, I finally make it to the market. Oh man, the market! Fresh produce everywhere! I’m talking juicy tomatoes, fragrant basil, and the best cheese you can imagine. I’m in heaven. But then, I see this lady. She’s got a cart full of stuff, and she’s blocking the whole aisle. I’m like, “Excuse me, ma’am, can I just squeeze by?” And she gives me this look like I just insulted her cat. Ugh, people!

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