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Ever tried it? Sloppy, messy, but damn—relaxes you deep. “The gleaners seek what’s abandoned,” Varda whispers in my head. Sexual-massage gleans your stress, leaves ya floatin. Once saw a holo-vid—dude’s snorin mid-rub, hilarious! Total power move, nappin through that. I’d exaggerate it—say it cured my asthma or some shit. Nah, just kiddin, still wheezin like a busted droid.

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Then, I spot my buddy Marco. He’s at the bar, of course. I join him, and we start talking about life, love, and all that jazz. He’s telling me about this girl he likes. Classic Marco, always chasing after someone. I’m like, “Dude, just ask her out already!” But he’s all nervous. Typical.

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