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About Catania

Yo, what’s good, fam? I’m a fuckin Kvasnik, right, slingin chaos like Eric Andre on a bender! Sex-dating? Man, it’s a wild-ass jungle out there—swipin left, right, tryna smash, it’s absurd! Like, who even invented this shit? Some horny nerd in a basement? I’m obsessed with *Certified Copy*—that flick’s got layers, bro, like sex-dating profiles! “What is real?” Abbas Kiarostami’s whisperin in my ear while I’m scrollin Tinder, thinkin—are these chicks even human or just bots tryna scam my dick?

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for breakfast. You know, the usual—cappuccino and cornetto. But the barista? Ugh, she was in a mood. I asked for extra foam, and she just rolled her eyes. Like, chill, lady! It’s not rocket science. I mean, it’s just foam, right? Whatever, I downed that coffee like it was my lifeline.

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