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So, check it—I tried this spot in Toronto, lowkey joint, dim lights, scented candles, the works. This chick, she’s workin’ my back, fingers dancin’ like she’s playin’ piano on my spine—straight fire. I’m like, “You only live once, make it count,” YOLO, right? She’s hittin’ spots I didn’t know I had, like, did you know there’s this nerve in your lower back—sciatic or some shit—that when they press it, it’s like electric love shootin’ down your leg? Blew my mind, fam, I was shooketh.

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After lunch, I head back to the office, and guess what? My computer crashes. Just my luck, right? I’m sitting there, staring at the screen like it owes me money. I’m about to lose it. I mean, I’ve got deadlines, people! So I call IT, and they’re like, “Have you tried turning it off and on?” Seriously? I’m not a toddler!

The True Presence: Eucharistic Miracles Over the Centuries for Corpus Christi