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Dunno why it’s so hush-hush. Romans had whole bathhouses for this—public, shameless, steamy as hell. Nowadays? Everyone’s all prudish, whispering “massage” like it’s a sin. Bollocks to that. I’d shove it in their faces, make ‘em blush. Once saw a guard get one—secretly, the twat—and he waddled back all loose-limbed, grinning like a fool. Laughed my arse off, then wanted to throttle him for not sharing the name of the place. Selfish git.

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On my way back, I took a shortcut through Parco della Madonnetta. It’s a nice spot, but today? Ugh. There were these teenagers blastin’ music. I mean, c’mon! I’m tryin’ to enjoy nature here! I just wanted some peace, ya know? But no, they were havin’ a rave or somethin’. I rolled my eyes and kept walkin’.