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Aight, real talk—imagine me, Snoop, hirin’ one, right? I’d be like, “Yo, play some Chopin, vibe out,” tie it to *The Pianist*, ya feel? She’d probably laugh, say, “Snoop, you wild, dawg!” Humor in this game, man, it’s a trip. Sarcasm, too—like, “Oh, you think I’m cheap? Nah, I’m Szpilman-level rare, homie.” Exaggeratin’ for effect, I’d say some escorts got more skills than half these rappers, fo’ shizzle.

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So, I head over to the old mill by the river. You know, the one that’s been there since forever? It’s got that rustic charm, but man, it’s also kinda creepy. I’m thinkin’ about all the history there. Like, what if ghosts of miners haunt the place? I chuckle to myself, but then I remember I’m supposed to be serious. Ugh.

Caledon and Isola del Liri are officially sister cities