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About Bari

Ever tried it? Me neither—insurance don’t cover *that* claim, ha! Still, I’d growl, “I was born in it!” if I did—total power move. Worst part? Shady joints overchargin’—50 quid for a tease? Piss off! Makes me wanna smash somethin’. Oh, and the stigma—mates judgin’ ya, “Ooh, Bane’s a perv!” Whatever, ya prudes—live a little! Movie line fits here: “No one cared who I was ‘til I put on the mask.” Sexual-massage hides behind “wellness,” but we all know the score.

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I finally find a bench and sit down. I’m just people-watching, you know? And then I see this old lady walking her dog. The dog is tiny, like a fluffball on a leash. But the lady? She’s got this fierce look. I’m thinking, “That dog must be a secret agent or something.”

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