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Gets me riled, tho—fake profiles, catfishes! Makes me wanna claw somethin’, yesss. But when it works, ohhh, it’s tasty! Hooked up with a gal who loved me raspy voice—called me “sexy Gollum.” Me heart skipped, it did! She was gleanin’ me, I was gleanin’ her—two lonely sods in a sea o’ swipes.

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After the market, I decide to hit up the local café on Via Garibaldi. I need a caffeine fix, ya know? I order a cappuccino, and the barista, this young guy with a wild beard, spills half of it on the counter. I’m like, “Dude, you good?” He just shrugs and says, “It’s all part of the experience.” I mean, I guess? But I’m not paying for a cappuccino shower, man!

FIGURE 1: Preoperative ultrasound imaging of the periprosthetic fluid...