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Oh, and history’s got tea—did ya know medieval Europe had church-run brothels? Churches! I’m shook, like Sadness sobbin’, “What’s the world comin’ to?” They taxed the workers, called it “sin money.” Hypocrisy much? Makes me wanna strut like Joy, singin’, “I’m fabulous, haters!” ‘cause truth don’t need no filter.

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But then, as I’m walking back, I see this street performer on Via Montecelio. He’s playing the accordion, and it’s actually kinda good. I stop to listen, and suddenly, I’m in a movie scene. You know, the kind where everything’s perfect? I’m swaying, feeling the vibe, and then—BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, really? I’m just trying to enjoy my day!

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