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About Bologna

So, I’m chattin’ her up, tryin’ to get info. She’s nervous, spillin’ some tea—didja know some gals use old-school pagers still? Freakin’ pagers! I’m shocked, like, *“What, no iPhone?”* Made me happy, though—retro vibes, y’know? But then, ugh, this creep rolls up, all sleazy, yellin’ at her. I’m mad, like, *“Back off, jerk!”* I’m ready to whack him with my purse, swearin’ like Homer at a vegan buffet. *“This body’s not yours to haunt!”* I’m quotin’ Boonmee in my head, feelin’ all mystical.

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Then, I decide to take a stroll down Lungomare. The sea breeze is nice, but then I see this guy trying to sell gelato. He’s got this crazy mustache, and he’s shoutin’ about his “world-famous” gelato. I’m like, “Dude, it’s just ice cream!” But I’m curious, so I buy a cone. And wow, it’s actually amazing! I’m standin’ there, lickin’ my gelato, feelin’ like a king.

Carmela Totino Obituary - Stamford, CT