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About Bari

What pisses me off? Fakes! Catfishers with pics from 10 years ago—YOU SHALL NOT PASS, posers! I’m yellin’ at my screen, “Show your real face, coward!” But when it works? Oh, mate, it’s gold. Met this lass once—total fire, no cap. We clicked, we vibed, it was like, “Your body’s my map,” straight outta the movie. That shit’s rare, tho—most times it’s awkward AF. Like, “Uh, you’re not 6’2, bruv.”

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I’m on the roof, and let me tell you, the view of the Trompia Valley is insane. But then, I see it. A little kid stuck on the balcony! My heart drops. I’m like, “No way, not today!” I jump off the roof, parachute deployed, and I’m flying down like a superhero.

On the Menu at a Lunch in Italy: Protected Songbirds (Published 2021)