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About Turin

Alright, my friend, gather round! I’m Gandalf, the riff-wielding master of strings, and I’ve got THOUGHTS on this sex-dating nonsense. You shall not pass! Not without hearin’ me out first. Picture this – me, strummin’ my axe, watchin’ the world swipe left and right like it’s some kinda Middle-earth meat market. Drives me up the bloody wall! All these apps, promisin’ quick hookups – “In the end, it’s all lies!” Like that line from *The Lives of Others*, y’know? People tappin’ away, thinkin’ they’re free, but they’re just spied on by algorithms. Creepy as hell.

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Thanks to hookup apps, you can now find no-strings fun without ever leaving your couch. Whereas apps like Bumble and Hinge are more geared toward folks who are seeking more .

Finally, I duck into this little trattoria, Trattoria da Gigi. Best decision ever! I order a plate of risotto alla Milanese, and it’s like a hug in a bowl. I’m scarfing it down, and the owner, Gigi, comes over. He’s this big guy with a heart of gold. He’s like, “You like? I make with love!” And I’m like, “Dude, I can taste the love!”

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