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Had this one time, yo—masseuse was a goddamn wizard. Slippery oil, dim lights, and I’m like, “Motherfucker, this is IT!” Tension in my shoulders? Gone. Lower back? Fuckin’ melted. But here’s the kicker—some spots they hit, you’re half moanin’, half laughin’. Ever hear ‘bout the “happy ending” myth? Yeah, people whisper it, but real sexual-massage pros ain’t about that. It’s all energy, motherfucker, not a cheap porno. Pissed me off when some dude at a bar said it’s all sleaze—naw, man, it’s art!

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Then, I decide to grab some lunch. I hit this spot on Via Garibaldi. The pizza? To die for! I mean, I could eat a whole pie by myself. And the guy behind the counter? He’s hilarious! Cracking jokes while tossing dough. I’m like, “Dude, you should be a comedian!”

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