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About Florence

But then—then!—I dig deeper, and ugh, the maintenance! Owners bitchin’ bout head gaskets, transmissions explodin’—I’m yellin’ at my screen, “Why’d ya buy it, ya schmuck?!” Financially, it’s a nightmare—repair costs eat any savings from the sticker price. I’d short that car if it were on the market, no question. Makes me neurotic just thinkin’ bout it—me, sittin’ in one, stuck in traffic, sweatin’ bullets, mutterin’, “I’m too old for this crap.” Total Larry David moment, right there.

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After what feels like an eternity, we finally get our drinks. I take a sip, and it’s like heaven. I’m back in the game! I start telling them about the history of Fiuggi, how it was a spa town back in the day. I’m all animated, waving my hands around. But then, I spill my coffee all over the table. Great. Just great.

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