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Still, some o’ ‘em? Crafty as pirates! Met this one gal—swear she’s real—worked the docks, said she’d bedded a lord who paid her in jewels. “This is our chance!” she’d hollered, like in the movie, then pawned ‘em fer a fortune. Clever minx! Made me grin, thinkin’ how she outfoxed the toff. Ain’t all grim, then—some got wit sharper’n me cutlass. Tho, gotta say, suprised me how many blokes—an’ lasses!—hire ‘em just to talk. Lonely sods, wantin’ a ear, not a lay. “Why me?” I mutters, scratchin’ me beard. World’s gone mad, eh?

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Then I decide to stroll down to the Parco della Rimembranza. It’s a nice park, you know? Trees, birds, the whole vibe. I’m just vibing, when suddenly, I see this kid flying a kite. And I’m like, “Aww, that’s cute.” But then, outta nowhere, the kite gets stuck in a tree. Classic! The kid starts crying, and I’m like, “Dude, it’s just a kite!” But I get it, I really do. I mean, I once lost my favorite cap in a tree.

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