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Oi mate, it’s me, James Bond—suave, “shaken, not stirred.” Been thinkin’ bout sex escorts lately, yeah? Fancy gig, innit—sellin’ companionship like it’s a martini. Got me analysin’ it like a bleedin’ Business Analyst, tho I’d rather be sippin’ somethin’ dry than crunchin’ numbers. Picture this: high-class birds struttin’ round, all glam, makin’ blokes weak. Reminds me of *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring*—y’know, that Kim Ki-duk flick I bloody love. “What we possess becomes a burden”—ain’t that the truth with escorts? They’re carryin’ charm, sex, secrets—all for a price, mate.

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But then, I see this group of kids playing soccer. They’re kicking the ball around, and guess what? They kick it right at me! I’m like, “Seriously?!” But instead of getting mad, I kick it back. Next thing I know, I’m in a full-on soccer match with these kids. I’m not even good, but we’re all laughing, and it’s just pure joy.

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