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About Florence

Funny thing—some call it “happy endin’” and wink like they’re clever. Pfft, I say—gimme the full voyage, not just the dockin’! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d wager me hat it beats scrubbin’ decks. So, ye want me take, mates? Sexual-massage be a wild ride—luxury, mischief, and a touch o’ madness. “I’m not crazy!” I’d holler, like Lisa, if they said I liked it too much. Try it, ye landlubbers—savvy?

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But then, I see this guy on Via Aurelia, trying to juggle. He’s awful! Like, seriously, how do you drop three balls in a row? I’m cracking up, and he catches me laughing. He gives me this look like, “You think you can do better?” So, I’m like, “Challenge accepted!” I grab a couple of oranges from a nearby stand, and I’m juggling. Spoiler: I drop one. It rolls away, and I’m chasing it down the street.

Porrettana Express: tour among the villages of the Pistoia mountains