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Little known fact, tho—back in the 90s, before apps, folks used newspaper ads for hookups. Called ‘em “personal columns.” Horny losers writin’, “Man seeks woman, no strings, must like cats.” Imagine the balls it took! No pics, just vibes. Now we got dick pics flyin’ left n’ right—progress, huh? Makes me laugh, but also kinda pissed. Where’s the mystery? Everybody’s oversharin’. “We’re gonna find out who did this,” like the *Spotlight* team, but in sex-dating, it’s more like, “Who’s gonna screw me over next?”

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After that, I decided to hit up the local market on Via Garibaldi. Man, the vibe there is always lit! Fresh fruits, veggies, and the smell of fresh bread. I’m drooling just thinking about it. But then, I see this guy trying to haggle over a bunch of tomatoes. Like, c’mon man, it’s not that serious! Just buy the damn tomatoes! 😂

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